Blog, in hot pursuit

One Another

February 19, 2012

Week 6 – IN HOT PURSUIT

We have checked our hearts, thrown off the weights and sin, forgotten what’s behind, reached forward—in faith, being strong and courageous, even counting it joy in trials—and we have focused on our mindset.  Today, in this last week of In Hot Pursuit, we are taking the focus off of self and putting it on others.

We are not meant to run alone.  We run this race interconnected with others.

As believers, we are part of a body—Jesus is the head, and we are the members.

“For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.” Romans 12:4-5

“. . .we are to grow up in all aspects into Him, who is the head, even Christ, from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by that which every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.” Ephesians 4:15-16

Stop and think.  Do you connect regularly with others in the body of Christ?  Or do you tend to run in isolation?

I love that God sees us as “fitted parts” that are built up in love when each of us is properly working.  As we run our race well, it benefits others.  But we also have specific obligations toward one another.  And they are many:

  • “Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor.”  Romans 12:10
  • “Now may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you to be of the same mind with one another . . .” Romans 15:5
  • So then let’s pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another.”  Romans 14:19
  • “ . . . that there should be no division in the body, but that the members should have the same care for one another.”  1 Corinthians 12:25
  • “. . .through love serve one another.”  Galatians 5:13
  • “Bear one another’s burdens . . .”  Galatians 6:2
  • “And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.”  Ephesians 4:32
  • “Therefore encourage one another, and build up one another . . .” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
  • “And let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds . . .” Hebrews 10:24
  • “Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed.”  James 5:16
  • “Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.”  1 Peter 4:8
  • “Be hospitable to one another without complaint.”  1 Peter 4:9
  • “As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.”  1 Peter 4:10.

It’s striking how often God speaks in His word about what we ought to do for “one another.” We are essential to each other in this race.  But it’s even more than that.

Not only do we help others as they run; we are to prefer others.  Selfishness and pride have no place in this race.

“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind let each of you regard one another as more important than himself . . .”  Philippians 2:3

Read additional “one another” verses:

1 Corinthians 12:20-27

Ephesians 4:2

1 Thessalonians 3:12

1 Thessalonians 4:9

1 John 3:11

1 John 4:7

Philippians 2:3-11

Do you allow others to help you as you run your race?  Do you share your burdens so others can help you bear them?  On the flip side, do you look for opportunities to help others run their race?

You Might Also Like

40 Comments

  • Reply Stephanie February 20, 2012 at 12:46 pm

    Such a timely post–thank you Kim. I am really trying to find good friends that I can open up to. With our hectic lives, it’s so hard to find time on people’s calendars to try to connect with them. What happened to the days when you could meet weekly with a friend over coffee? The relationships I try to cultivate always require scheduling time about a month in advance. So much can change within a month. There might be something now that I need prayer for. It seemed easier to have meaningful relationships with other women before I got married and had a child. Other mothers that I talk to at church seem so busy that we can only have “vanilla” conversations after church because there’s really not time to go beneath the surface. I’m really praying for God’s direction and I’m trying to stay open during this somewhat lonely season in my life. Thanks for your encouragement!

    • Reply Danielle February 20, 2012 at 3:28 pm

      Hi Stephanie – I’m praying for you now. I totally know what you’re going through – it IS really tough to find deep friendships in these busy times, especially when we are busy moms. I struggle with the same thing. I’ve been praying for some time to find a good “Mommy friend” and sister in Christ that I can connect with and get to know on a deeper level. It’s tough, and I am praying that your loneliness is temporary, and that God will put someone in your path to connect with and grow with. :) Be encouraged!

      • Reply Stephanie February 20, 2012 at 3:48 pm

        Thanks Danielle! It’s nice to hear that I’m not alone. I really appreciate your prayers and I’ll lift you up as well.

        • Reply LaRena February 20, 2012 at 4:27 pm

          Hello Stephanie

          I used to have the same issue with finding time to what I like to call “cultivating” friendships. I know for me I had to make the conscious decision to make friends and then spend time with them. I went thru a period of isolation which was needed but then when it was time to come out of that isolation I felt like I needed a Dummies book on friendship.

          Two places I have found to be a blessing is Facebook and my church. I have reconnected with so many of my high school classmates on Facebook. I’m not as active as I want to be in my church but I have been able to make a few friends there.

          Another suggestion that may work for you is accountability. My friends and I are quick to call each other out when we feel neglected. At the beginning of the year my church friends made a decision that we would do one outing a month with no excuses.

          I hope these suggestions are helpful.

          ~LaRena

          • Stephanie February 20, 2012 at 5:03 pm

            LaRena–very helpful suggestions–I especially like the accountability idea–thank you!

      • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 20, 2012 at 4:44 pm

        Praying for you too, Danielle! I know the Lord is hearing all these hearts desirous of cultivating friendships in Him. His Word is filled with “one another” verses, so we know it’s His will to send people into our lives with whom we can cultivate “one another” relationships. I praise Him that as you’re waiting, He will also use this time to cultivate a closer relationship with you Himself.

        • Reply Danielle February 21, 2012 at 7:05 am

          Thank you, Kim! :)

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 20, 2012 at 4:38 pm

      Hi Stephanie! I’m so glad you were willing to share from your heart in this way because it’s a very real issue that so many of us struggle with. I’m guilty myself of finding it hard to schedule time to meet with people. I thought when I stopped homeschooling and the kids went to school, I’d have all kinds of “free” time…and I haven’t found it yet! BUT, cultivating friendships is important. And like you, I want to be able to go beyond the surface and deal with what’s happening FOR REAL. I’m so sorry that this is a lonely time for you. Like Danielle and LaRena, I’m lifting you up, for the Lord to send a special friend with whom you can open up and bond. I do want to add as well that God can send people into our lives who may not be friends on a peer level, but someone like a “Titus 2” older woman (as an example) who can encourage and counsel us, pray for us, etc. Sometimes that “one another” relationship is packaged differently than we might think at first. Still, God knows your heart’s desire for a true friend, and He is more than able to provide. Praying right now, sis!

      • Reply Stephanie February 20, 2012 at 5:07 pm

        Thanks Kim. I will definitely keep my eyes open for a friendship that might come in an unexpected way. Your comment reminds me of an elderly neighbor who has stopped by when I’ve been out of town. I will make it a point to go by and see her this week! Thanks so much for the prayers! I feel encouraged already!

    • Reply Geri February 20, 2012 at 6:25 pm

      Hey Stephanie! I hear your hearts cry and I’m partnering with the rest of our Colorful Family in prayer that God too will hear your heart and answer your prayer for a Godly friend. This can be a tough season to go through, but it is a season and will change. Stay encouraged. XOXO

      • Reply Stephanie February 20, 2012 at 7:06 pm

        Hi Geri! I am so thankful to have people like you praying for me–thank you sweet sister!

        • Reply Heather February 21, 2012 at 1:19 pm

          Oh, Stephanie, I feel the same way! It is SO hard to meet people and connect in this way. I have work colleagues, etc. but it’s just not the same.

    • Reply Kristian February 21, 2012 at 11:26 pm

      Stephanie, darling! I have been wanting to comment to you for three days now! It is so hard, you’re def right to connect with ppl. I found that out when I added text to my phone in 2010. Yeah I know I was super late for just getting it but I’m more of a talker than texter. But it’s just like, what happened to the good old fashioned days when you picked up the phone and just called a friend and they came by. No texting converations or IM, or emails or no day dates. Too much work! But I understand and know exactly how you feel about being lonely. Will be praying for you. And if you want more than a vanilla convo, email me sometime and hopefully we can connect. I’m not married or with chilren, so maybe you can teach me a thing or two. With Love! Kristian!

  • Reply LaRena February 20, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    Awesome list of scriptures. I’m going to share today’s blog with all of my friends and print off this list to post somewhere convenient for me to reference it.

    Thanks Kim!!!!

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 20, 2012 at 4:45 pm

      LaRena, I’m so glad you find this list useful! Praying God uses it to bear immense “one another” fruit in your life. :) Blessings, sis!

  • Reply Ciara Thompson February 20, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    Hey Kim
    I do connect with others in the body of Christ. I have one friend who I talk to on a regular basis. I call her my Mama Mi. When I’m going through a challenge or if I’m down about something. She always encourage me. She has helped me with my walk in Christ. When I didn’t think God was hearing my prayers or even speaking to me. She broke down everything for me so that I can have a better understanding. The Lord laid it on my heart to write my father who is in prison, I was having second thoughts about the whole thing, I haven’t seen or spoken to my father in 18 years. So I called Mama Mi and she told me to do what was right. I then asked God again for conformation. I wrote the letter but never sent if off( sounds bad I know). If I have a question about the bible or anything that pertains to God. She’ll give me a mimi bible study lesson. I think God for Mama Mi. When I got back in church 8 years ago I will isolate myself, I didn’t want anyone to know what I was going through. At the time I was like no one needs to know what I’m going through but God. Keeping yourself isolated from others is depressing in my book. We need to express ourselves to feel free. I have this other friend( ……long pause) I’m trying to help my other friend but she’s too stubborn, two stubborn and head strong women have a hard time agreeing o n certain things. I’m still praying for her to come to her senses. Lol
    Thanks
    Ciara

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 21, 2012 at 7:56 pm

      Hey Ciara! I love that you have your Mama Mi! :) It’s such a blessing to have someone who will encourage, counsel, and even break down the Bible! She’s a true gift from God. I hear you on not wanting people to know what you were going through. I think the natural tendency is to remain private (I know that’s *my* natural tendency. ;-)) But having at least one person you can trust and bare your soul makes a big difference. Sounds like your other friend is where you were. :) Yes, pray for her…I bet you’ll see a change! :)

  • Reply Danielle February 21, 2012 at 9:35 am

    When I looked at the questions, the first thing that came to mind is that it is much easier to help others than it is to ask for help ourselves. I find joy in serving/helping/listening to others, but I’ve always been the “stoic one” who found it hard to ever admit or show weakness.

    Of course, God knew better than I, and especially in the past 2 years, He has chipped away at the wall I’d built (sometimes laying me REALLY low in the process!)and showed me that it is so much better when you have people to share with and be real with. It’s still not easy for me, but I am learning to trust others and am experiencing some of the joy and comfort that comes from knowing there are people who are willing to listen, pray, help, and guide me. Plus, giving that fake facade of “everything is ok, nothing I can’t handle” did not do me any favors.

    It’s still easier for me to help others, though! :)

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 21, 2012 at 8:05 pm

      Danielle, that’s so interesting…I can definitely see how it would be easier to serve/help/listen to others. That’s a safe place. You can give of your attention…which is HUGE and much needed… but you don’t have to give away the secret places of your heart. Often too, if you’re the one who people come to for help or counsel, they see you as the strong one. So it may even become harder to “admit or show weakness.” I’m glad God has been chipping away at that wall, though. :) It is so freeing when there’s someone else to help share a burden…and a listening (and trustworthy) ear is a big part of sharing that burden. I can feel such a difference when I’ve shared something, and I know the person is praying. God has given us the gift of one another…fellow members of the body who are indwell and led by the Holy Spirit and able to help us. That is such an AWESOME reality. I pray it be a very present reality in each of our lives.

      • Reply Danielle February 22, 2012 at 8:00 am

        It IS freeing! I can think of times in my past when God put VERY unexpected people in my path who shared some of my burden and helped me through. It felt like I could breathe again! These days, he’s doing it much more often, and it is such a blessing and relief to know that I have people I can talk to who won’t judge me for crying (I’m a crier!) or for admitting that things aren’t “perfect”, and it’s opening my eyes to the realization that I am not alone. God is SO awesome, even (and probably especially!) in the midst of difficulty.

        I just talked to my best friend last night, and I am always amazed at her….no matter what she is dealing with, she remains the most positive, upbeat, faithful person, trusting in God’s ultimate will and ALWAYS taking time to ask “How are you? What’s going on in your life?”. She is able to – with her close friends and family – openly admit where she falls short or is struggling, and it makes her one of the strongest people I know! Her attitude is infectious, and I admire her so much for her spirit.

    • Reply Deborah February 25, 2012 at 8:04 pm

      Reposting because I originally posted in wrong place:
      Danielle: Your response spoke to my heart because I’ve been sitting on something for a few weeks now that I’ve only shared with my spouse. Why…because all the people I could turn to are so bogged down with stuff going on in their own lives. It’s not that I’m stoic, I just can’t bear burdening anyone else right now. I’ve been to six funerals/calling hours over the past 8 days including my uncle, have a elderly cousin who was recently given a terminal diagnosis, a childhood friend who recently was told she has stage 4 cancer, 2 good friends who are recovering from surgery, my sister who leans on me for counsel due to her home situation, my mom who is in so much physical pain, etc. Because my burden was growing, I asked my husband, who is my BFF, to pray for me with me which he’s been doing every morning before going to work. This has been helpful. My prayer to God is that He give me the fortitude to accept His will for the outcome of pending medical tests. When I know more, I’ll feel better about sharing within my circle of family/friends.

      • Reply Deborah February 25, 2012 at 8:08 pm

        Oops, I had posted this in the right spot, but addressed it to the wrong person. I meant to respond to LaKeisha!

  • Reply LaKeisha Collins February 21, 2012 at 10:26 pm

    Do you allow others to help you as you run your race? This really made me think. If I’m truly honest, the answer would be not really. I do have one friend, whom I call my purpose partner, who helps me along the path the Lord has set before me. Other than that, I’d have to say no.

    Do you share your burdens so others can help you bear them? I used to, but lately not so much. As I’ve matured in Christ, and He’s strengthened me in my walk with Him, I find it harder to bare my soul, or share my burdens with others. Not because I’m ashamed, but because I feel like I’m supposed to always be strong enough to go straight to the Lord for myself. I find myself taking on the I-can-handle-it-on-my-own mentality a lot lately. Something I’m really praying about…everybody needs somebody’s help.

    On the flip side, do you look for opportunities to help others run their race? OMGoodness, do I!! All of the time. I’m a helper by nature, and the Lord has really given me a heart for intercession, so I’m always mentoring, counseling, or praying for others. It’s easier for me to help someone, than to be helped…wow, did I just admit that?!

    This is good, Kim. Very timely for me…

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 22, 2012 at 8:04 pm

      LaKeisha, I have never heard this and I love it…”my purpose partner”…that says so much! What a gift. I can imagine the conversations you have and the prayers that are prayed. “I feel like I’m supposed to always be strong enough to go straight to the Lord for myself”…*raising hand* I’m guilty of that too. Like you, I’m usually counseling/exhorting others rather than the other way around. BUT, I do have people in my life who I can turn to for that, and I’m sooooo thankful. I’m encouraging you to keep praying about that. :) It’s nothing like having strong believers who are steeped in the word, who care deeply about your spiritual well-being, and who are willing to help bear your burdens. I love that you are always there for others, though! I can totally see that. :)

    • Reply Deborah February 25, 2012 at 8:03 pm

      Danielle: Your response spoke to my heart because I’ve been sitting on something for a few weeks now that I’ve only shared with my spouse. Why…because all the people I could turn to are so bogged down with stuff going on in their own lives. It’s not that I’m stoic, I just can’t bear burdening anyone else right now. I’ve been to six funerals/calling hours over the past 8 days including my uncle, have a elderly cousin who was recently given a terminal diagnosis, a childhood friend who recently was told she has stage 4 cancer, 2 good friends who are recovering from surgery, my sister who leans on me for counsel due to her home situation, my mom who is in so much physical pain, etc. Because my burden was growing, I asked my husband, who is my BFF, to pray for me with me which he’s been doing every morning before going to work. This has been helpful. My prayer to God is that He give me the fortitude to accept His will for the outcome of pending medical tests. When I know more, I’ll feel better about sharing within my circle of family/friends.

      • Reply Deborah February 25, 2012 at 8:10 pm

        Oops, I meant LaKeisha, not Danielle.

  • Reply Kristian February 21, 2012 at 11:21 pm

    Kim, this is the third or fourth time I have read the blog and all the other comments. Def time for me to respond. Okay, so I am a helper by nature. Myles Munroe breaks that down real plain and clear for me. Women are helpers and nurturers, and those 2 words def describes me. My joy and one of my purposes is to help others: young, old, small, big, just plain old help! It is usually very hard for me to get help back with my own “issues”. I mean not to sound braggy, but there is not tnhat many young women in my age range on fire for God. BUT God! Unitl I came to the blog family. I have been able to share my strory with countless # of women and vent and as Geri says, “unload” to many of these beautiful women of God. So yes to both. I have always been a helper and I am learning to receive help! Praise God for that!

    * Oh, I have an update for you ladies too. I found out about a week ago, that the distict I work for “found” some money to pay us again for my morning job as a tutor on tues/thurs morn. They are even willing to give us a few extra hrs at another school, my coworker and myself. And as first I told God and the teacher I work for that I felt relieved of that job, that he released me. But then one day I was in the building for my after school job and so many of my morning kids screamed and ran up to me saying “Ms Green, r u back, we miss u!!!!”. I felt so loved and they made me want to be back. They made me want to wake up again at 5:45 and start my day. I didn’t feel like I made a huge diff but I guess God showed me I did. I start back on the 28th. Praise God for being in his perfect will. And also, I’m not sure how long I will be at my after school job, I feel the Lord kinda releasing me and I’m not “feeling” needed there anymore. I’m just praying that God’s will might be done and that I can accept it! Please ladies be in agreement for me. I love yall much!

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 22, 2012 at 8:14 pm

      Kristian, I’ve told you many times that there aren’t that many young women your age on fire for God. I love that about you. And I’m so thrilled that you’re able to gather with other women here, “unload,” help, and be helped. I praise God for that too! :) And I praise God for your update! Were you surprised that those kids missed you?? OF COURSE they did….that’s your ministry! :) I wish I could see you at school with them. :)

      • Reply Kristian February 25, 2012 at 12:29 am

        Kim! Thanks so much for your encoragement, u keep me pumped up girl! I need it more than you know!

  • Reply Kristian February 21, 2012 at 11:30 pm

    Oh I almost forgot. This is so funny that this was the post for Monday, because just on Monday I was telling/writing to God, telling him that I was afraid to show weakness. See I’m ALWAYS the strong one of my fam, my students, my coworkers, my church fam. It seems almost embarassing or too needy to need help. But I have prayed and God is reall breaking me in this area. Kim, thanks so much for being so awesome. You seem to be reading my heart dear sister. You seem to discern me so well, and ope up things in me, that I don’t realize is even there. Love you all the more!

    • Reply Danielle February 22, 2012 at 7:53 am

      Kristian, first off, congrats on God’s movement in your work situation! That is awesome! I used to be a teacher, and wow – out of the mouths of babes. Trust me, you DO have an effect on those kids…keep loving them!! :)

      Also – I’m right there with you when you talked about being the strong one, afraid to show weakness. That’s me! I could have written that same comment…..it’s exhausting, right?

      Praise God that He’s breaking both of us in this area. Blessings on your day!!!

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 22, 2012 at 8:28 pm

      Wow, I was just “talking” to LaKeisha about this above. Looks like a few of us are the “strong ones” in our circles. I’m learning more and more, though, the importance of opening up and baring my own soul. I’m glad we’re all seeing that it’s needful. :)

      • Reply Kristian February 25, 2012 at 12:32 am

        Oooh thanks Danielle, I needed to hear that cuz sometimes those kids……make me wanna………But yes, it is difficult ALWAYS being the strong one or the dependable one or the one that ppl can always come to. But yes he is breakngi us in that area and sometimes it hurts but its worth it!

  • Reply Kara February 22, 2012 at 8:03 am

    This is a touchy issue for me. I have always struggled with this. I love church, I love being together with others, worshipping and getting fed the Word. However, it rarely goes beyond that for me. I don’t really participate in other ministries and my main reason is because I don’t trust other people. Yes, I have experienced church hurt, and I don’t consider myself to be bitter, but on the other hand I am not willing to put myself in those situations.
    I am so tired of people saying one thing, worshipping one way and then when they get in the lobby or the parking lot, you see a totally different side.
    This is not to say that I am a perfect church member, but it would be nice to see some people who feel or have the same desires for God and His Word like me. Someone who is willing to listen and to relate and hold me accountable without me thinking, “now who are they going to go tell my business to?”
    I love Eph. 4:2 in the Message Bible, “And mark that you do this with humility and discipline-not in fits and starts, but steadily, pouring yourselves out for each other in acts of love,”
    I am pretty sure that somewhere along the way the answers lie within myself. What am I not doing? Where should I be more loving and with whom? Do I really look to share other’s burdens?? Well sometimes I do, with certain people. I know I need to look for opportunities to help anyone and to share anyone’s burdens.

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 22, 2012 at 8:51 pm

      Kara, it’s so sad that you’ve experienced such hurt and can’t find people to talk to that you trust. “Someone who is willing to listen and to relate and hold me accountable without me thinking, now who are they going to go tell my business to?'”…no, you can’t tell the deep things of your heart without being sure that they’ll hold it in confidence. But God is able to send you such a person. Perhaps He is using your current season to cultivate a deep, special relationship with Him. When He sends you that special “one another” friend, it might come from the least likeliest of places (doesn’t have to be church), so keep your eyes open. :)

  • Reply Candace February 22, 2012 at 10:21 am

    I so enjoy all the blog fam comments! Such real spirits and hearts…what a group!

    I think of David and Jonathan, Ruth and Naomi…

    Just in looking down through all the unity verses, how pressed I feel about how pressed Paul felt trying to keep the unity going. Poor Paul, it’s like a ring-side seat to an uphill, salmon-swimming-upstream chronic battle…no wonder he had tears and tears over it…how he must have cherished finding “the real glue” in the churches and towns he visited, the persons who were consistently the type you describe in your comments, the kind we see in this blog fam:)

    Enjoy your week!!!

    • Reply Kim Cash Tate February 22, 2012 at 8:52 pm

      David and Jonathan….what a special, deeply spiritual bond!!

  • Reply Friday Feature: Roundup Twelve | Musings of a (Recovering) Strong Black Woman February 24, 2012 at 2:41 pm

    […] One Another Related Posts:Friday Feature: Roundup Ten for the New YearFriday Feature: Roundup ElevenFriday Feature: Godly Food ChoicesFriday Feature: My Raw JourneyFriday Feature: Hunger Satisfaction v. Taste Satisfaction This entry was posted in Health, MUSINGS and tagged Raw vegan by rsmith. Bookmark the permalink. /* […]

  • Reply Deborah February 25, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    On Valentine’s Day, I heard a caller (Mike in Chicago) on Christian radio who talked about his wedding vows consisting of “One Another” – see link to the show: http://www.moodyradio.org/radioplayer.aspx?episode=83140&hour=1 (start listening at 35 minutes into the 50 minute program). They made 27 One Anothers into their wedding vows and each month they go through the list to see if they are still committed to each one of the One Anothers.

  • Leave a Reply